Is It Possible to Become a Normie Again?
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Ah: the joys of dating a normie. Now that the haze of lust and sex and honey has lifted, I meet things much more clearly now. (That, and I only got dumped by said normie then take all of this with a pinch of salt.) And yes, I know the following are generalizations and not all normies are like this, but come on, it's my correct to vent as a scorned woman. So delight save your indignant comments for the guy that just stole your parking spot or cut your precious front row seat at an AA meeting.
Afterwards a steady nutrition of vanilla and horrified statements of "You slept with HOW many people?" or "I can't believe yous already drank all those yerba mates!" I have realized that normal guys just don't become information technology and this is why I may never date a normie over again.
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one) They don't actually understand that y'all're non your past:
Despite claims of "I don't care about your by," they really do. Oh do they ever. And they always want to examine it, maybe because information technology's so foreign to them. It'south almost like being from another country. They're constantly agape that yous'll relapse while they smoke i Parliament Light and potable a Mike's Difficult Lemonade because they're "not an addict." But God forbid if you accept a puff of someone'southward cigarette, they're convinced yous're gonna be shooting dope into your neck in no fourth dimension. Truth is, I'grand a totally different person than I was over four years ago. I don't even recognize the sometime me that I've written or heard about. So when I hear a guy say, "This is but the way I am," I don't purchase it. You can modify. I did. I am fucking unrecognizable. And I'g distressing to say but it's rare to find a normie who sees your overcoming addiction and staying sober every bit the tremendous accomplishment that it is. They view you more equally a ticking time bomb or a woman with the ruddy letter A for addict.
2) They're pussies
Little things are big things to them because they haven't had, permit's say, the depth of experience that we've had. They say that church building is for people afraid of hell, and AA is for people who accept already been in that location. It's non their error. I wouldn't wish what I did to myself on my worst enemy. But life is nigh perspective. All people have a personal low or a rock lesser but you lot cannot compare getting behind on your mortgage to having to article of clothing a goddam bicycle helmet because yous gave yourself epilepsy from a brief but zealous methamphetamine habit. Oh, did y'all take a close call with getting an old girlfriend pregnant? I gave myself my own abortion in a Burger King bathroom. (Simply kidding—I've never been in a Burger King.) But seriously, have you been 5150'd more times than you've been to Whole Foods? No? Get a real problem and so nosotros'll talk.
3) They don't get that the darkness is funny
Our darkness freaks them out. Yep I fucked trolls and psychopaths and people likewise ugly to be extras on The Walking Dead… and at present it's hilarious. It has to be or it's unbearable and shameful. But watch the cringe of terror appear on your normie'south face up when you recount the story of meeting your coke dealer at Cedars Sinai before y'all had an outpaitent process. Or tell them that you lot played tic tac toe on your slashed wrists and no joke, a tear will whorl down their cheek. I don't need your compassion. I've got enough of my own. I demand a guy who can hold me while we giggle virtually what an idiot I've been. Only normies just don't have the stomach to deal with that stuff. Oh yeah, it's cool if it's in Breaking Bad or Ozark but not then much in their girlfriend.
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4) They haven't really dealt with their shit.
"The unexamined life is not worth living." These words were supposedly spoken by Socrates at his trial after he chose death rather than exile. Which ways most of the bozos I meet around here should just be shot. It is the rare normie who has actually lived an examined life and dealt with their issues. And I don't arraign them. It's no fun digging around in that stuff and doing inventories and examining character defects and making apology. I would never have done it if I didn't have to, Only to stay live and sober. So yes, I go it. No normie wants to unpack all that luggage and deal with it….unless you lot're gunning to be the side by side Dalai Lama. Simply how can we chronicle when I am constantly looking for my office in situations and he'southward just like "Fuck that guy?"
v) They're not as intense
"Nobody can ever dear you back they way you love," I heard once from my ex. Well I disagree. As addicts, despite our 400 forms of fear and our 4 million forms of neurosis, we are risk takers and fearless in love and other stupid stuff. We go whole hog into everything we do. Nosotros beverage hard, we drug difficult, we work hard, and we honey hard. And despite our exquisite sensitivity, we are resilient fuckers. "You're the strongest person I know," was i of the terminal things he said to me. You lot bet your sweetness ass I am.
Amy Dresner has been a columnist at The Fix since 2012 and is the author of the forthcoming My Fair Junkie. And she is on Twitter. And now she has her ain website!
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Source: https://www.thefix.com/5-reasons-why-i-might-never-date-normie-again
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